Scientology is the key to happiness! Just ask this guy.

Yes, we know you’ve read plenty of Scientology success stories in the past. But we were curious to see what you get out of this latest glowing testimonial from the UK headquarters, Saint Hill Manor, that was forwarded to us by Apostate Alex.

First, read this actual happy report which Scientology published, and let’s see if you pick out the same details that we did.

I am originally from Sweden and I am a second generation Scientologist. I have spent better part of my life out on the roads of the world, playing many different games in life. We Swedes are a conservative bunch, I admit. But I guess there is still a strain of adventure and exploration that has been passed down from the days of the Vikings, that urges us to leave behind our peaceful lives and existence to go out and seek adventure.

However, the greatest adventure of all, was never far from home in a foreign world. It was within me the whole time: Terra Incognita! I always knew from a very young age this was the game I wanted to play. The only game that mattered. All actions I’ve done in my life have been centered around this one purpose: to go up the Bridge to OT. I wanted to know who I am. I wanted knowledge and spiritual freedom for myself and others.

I decided many years ago that I wanted to do my OT levels at Saint Hill at Ron’s Home. There was no other place I would rather make it through the Wall of Fire. I knew that to make it to OT, I needed to be well prepared and trained as a Solo Auditor before I took myself in session.

Now if you want to learn a craft and learn it well, where do you go? Well you go to the best: Saint Hill! The amount of ARC here is unlike anywhere else. When I started this journey, Grade VI, R6EW, I had huge confusions blow off. It was like throwing myself into a dark clouded hurricane with the E-Meter being my compass.

LRH Tech is very powerful and as long as you follow LRH instructions you know you will always get through. At the beginning I couldn’t really imagine myself smiling or laughing after a huge loss I had, but going through R6EW, here I am again and I actually feel more happy than I’ve been in a VERY LONG time!

I finally feel myself. And to my own surprise I discovered I liked myself again after a long time on my track. Resulting in such an increased affinity for other beings. How can one truly love others if one doesn’t love oneself? I even discovered in my last session that I could flow affinity to those that I least wanted to!

My last session on R6EW was a very spiritual moment. This level restored to me the power of choice in a way one can only experience. I am self-determined and have my own beingnesses in the games I play. I can distinguish between myself and the reactive mind in a way I have never experienced before. Now, I am proud to say that I started the Clearing Course and I can’t imagine a greater adventure than to Clear myself right at Ron’s Home!

Hip, hip, hooray. Another Hubbardite pilgrim is exploring his own self and discovering who he is.

The acronym R6EW stands for “Routine 6 End Words,” and it’s done on Grade VI, before someone goes Clear (and then later come the OT levels.)

It’s a process of quizzing yourself while holding onto the E-meter cans and watching to see which words you come up with make the needle move, and in search for opposites, or end words.

The purpose, like so much of Scientology, is to convince the subject that there’s much more to him or her than they ever realized, and that these terms they settle on were buried deep within our minds as part of some vast galactic narrative. Are these words that move the needle remnants of our distant past lives on other planets? Are they evidence of implants by the evil psychs? Pay even more to find out!

You can see how this proposition — that you get to become a sort of archeologist, but the evidence of past civilizations that you’re digging up are inside your own head — can be an attractive one. And for fellows like this, who were born into it, it becomes a powerful drug.

Thankfully, Scientology is finding it harder and harder to find new people who will fork over huge sums for this malarkey.

In other news, tomorrow is Auditor’s Day!

And meanwhile, if you will spend the money to get out to Scientology’s floating cathedral in the Caribbean, they’ll teach you how to make a fortune!

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Source Code: Actual things founder L. Ron Hubbard said on this date in history

Avast, Ye Mateys: Snapshots from Scientology’s years at sea

Overheard in the Freezone: Indie Hubbardism, one thought at a time

Past is Prologue: From this week in history at alt.religion.scientology

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