[Today’s guest post is by Bruce Hines.]
This is a silly little thing about something that happened while I was in Scientology’s Sea Organization. I laugh every time I think about it. I just find it amusing. And it is a little snapshot of the insane existence inside that organization.
It has to do with a guy named Hansueli Stähli. He is from Switzerland. He married a lady named Heidi. Both of them were well-known people at the Int Base (the international management headquarters Scientology in Gilman Hot Springs, California). I got to know them in 1980 when I became an auditor in the Flag Service Organization in Clearwater, Florida. They were also auditors there. Back in those days it was possible to get a leave of absence. It was (and still is) official policy of the Sea Organization that a member is entitled to two weeks of vacation per year. From what I have heard, today it is next to impossible to get any time off at all. But at the time, Hansueli and Heidi wanted to take a trip back to Europe. In order to do that they had to get approval via a CSW (Completed Staff Work).
This CSW needed to show that their posts would be covered while they were gone. Heidi’s difficulty in this was that she was auditing people who had come to Flag from German-speaking areas. She needed another auditor who could audit in German or she would not be allowed to leave. She and I were both assigned to units that audited people who were already on their “OT Levels.” Because I had some fluency in German, I was the only other auditor who might be able to serve as her “replacement” during her leave.
I had lived in Germany but had not spoken German in five years. Plus, I was not familiar with the the German equivalents of the special terminology used in auditing, especially on the wacky OT levels. After hours, she drilled me on auditing at those levels until she felt satisfied that I could do it. She was then able to take her vacation while I audited some people from Germany. It all went OK. After that Hansueli and Heidi were good friends of mine.
Some years later we had all been transferred to work at the Int Base. We all ended up with posts that had something to do with auditing and the “technology” of Scientology. Much of the time Heidi was in the same unit as I. Hansueli went to Religious Technology Center (RTC), the highest entity on the base. David Miscavige called him “Hank,” as he had some kind of difficulty with the actual name. The people in RTC were strongly discouraged from “fraternizing” with folks who were posted in lower units. So, Hansueli couldn’t act friendly towards me, though on occasion some human warmth did shine through.
But one day, in the early 1990s, there could be no trace of friendship. Hansueli came down from on high to the unit where I was working to set us straight. It was a situation, often seen in the Sea Organization, where a more senior person calls some more junior people on the carpet, acting all tough and mad and “unreasonable.” This was not his true nature, though he could muster up a passable show of it. I don’t think he really had his heart in it. Some Sea Org executives seemed to relish such situations, apparently being innately mean.
Though Hansueli knew English well, he still spoke with a distinct Swiss accent. Also, for a person speaking in something other than their native tongue, figures of speech and idioms can
be a problem. Sometimes he said unexpected things.
Our offices were in a building named Del Sol on the Int Base. It was a wooden two-story structure that had served as a hotel back in the days when that property was a resort. Doors could be opened to connect adjacent rooms. We had three of them, with the Senior Case Supervisor International in one and some of his staff in the next two. We sat there going about our business, which mainly consisted of looking at those old CRT computer screens, sending messages, and digging through auditing records. Suddenly Hansueli burst through from the hallway, shouting and stomping around. He was acting angry about us not having done our jobs well enough. That usually meant that some higher-up in RTC had deemed that a program or order, out of literally hundreds, was not getting sufficient attention. Progress had been too slow. Hansueli was informing us of this in a very loud voice. There were six or seven of us listening to him. I remember him kicking the door that separated two rooms, causing it to slam against the desk next to it. At one point, in the most condescending, disgusted voice he could muster, he said, “You eager beavers!”
I had a hard time keeping a straight face. We were supposed to act respectful and repentant, promising to do better. I’m not sure what he was trying to say. For sure no one tried to correct him. Generally being called an eager beaver would be a compliment in the work place, right? It was certainly amusing. The Swiss accent made it even funnier.
The last I knew, both Hansueli and Heidi were still at the Int Base. I don’t believe they were on high posts any more. Through all the travails of life at that place, I always had a good relationship with them. There had been a lot of pressure on and indoctrination of Hansueli to get him to act that way. I’d love to see them again. It is too bad they are still caught in that web of lies.
— Bruce Hines
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That is a great story! I hope Hansueli gets to read it someday. He sounds like the kind of guy who would laugh at himself a little rather than declare scorched-earth war over something like that.
But the tantrum behavior in positions of power being “normal” is super disconcerting.
Thank you Bruce. 'Friends' in the Clamyverse seem to be hard to come by. Especially if. as you said, they come from different 'levels' in the structure. And if any offense is found or manufactured, someone on the lower level will be the one paying.
Still, 'eager beavers' is funny in that context. The comradery of people working with the same purpose should have made most of the company at least friendly to each other. In most of my jobs the group goes out for drinks or dinners on occasion. That doesn't seem to happen at all in $cientology.
I guess they never have retirement parties in the Sea bOrg, as no one ever retires. That nose to the grindstone attitude sucks. Roses smell good and must be smelled from time to time.