At Scientology the fundraising never stops. However, you can imagine that the marks get a little wary after a while when they keep getting invited down for the same speakers and topics before they have to open up their wallets. So the “Int Landlord Office” has sent out a survey in order to get some ideas for how to entice wealthy members down for a fleecing.
Will Gavin Potter and Micheal Chan be in the running for favorite speaker?? The old 'beat the bushes' faith healing, snake oil salespeople crew seems to be out to lunch. Maybe the old Hamhock himself, Grant Cardone can show up. Who doesn't like Hamhock in their rice and beans?
I noticed, after a careful reading, the survey never specifically asks, "What would it take to get you to actually come to an Ideal Org event?" Or, "Why, or for what reason, would you attend."
Instead, the survey author takes up the position that of course you want to attend if presented with the right features and enhancements.
Well, my answer, if asked, would be that the only Ideal Org topic I am interested in is "How can Scientologists legally remove David Miscavige and replace him with a sane individual?"
I would not answer the survey after be being asked to state: "Ideal Org Donation Status:" I mean, that's a clear indication that if you write in "N/A," you are an out ethics Scientologist that needs to be handled.
I would love to see Joy Grayson perform! And Leah Remini speak about the ideal orgs.
Name:____Arse Ben Rippedout______________________________ Org:_Floundering Church, DC_________________
State or Country you live in:___Farsec_____________________________________
Case Level:__Clear(ed of assets and common sense)__________________ Training Level:___Intergalactic McSavage Cuckold________________
Ideal Org Donation Status:__Gleefully Broke_______________________________________
1. If you were to attend an event, which public or OT Committee member (either local or international) would you be most interested in hearing from?
Nancy Cuckwright...and Tony Muhammad
2. Which Class V staff members (either local or international) would you be most interested in hearing from at this event?
That Moxon lady
3. Which management terminals from either the CLO or INT do you like hearing from at events?
International Jerkoff Chief
4. Which management terminals from either the CLO or INT are you most interested in attending a seminar from?
Whoever the Head Pimp is...
5. Which Flag staff member would you like to hear from at an event?
Pat Harney(I hear that she is an expert on the subject of "animating MEST".)
6. Which Flag staff member would you be most interested in attending a seminar from?
The one who eats the most rice and beans!
7. Which Ideal Org topics are you most interested in attending a seminar or hearing a speech on?
How do I get all of my money back?
8. What type of music or performances are you most interested in seeing at an event?
Grunt Cardone: how to chew cigars and guiltlessly rip people off
9. Who was your favorite performer that you’ve seen at an event?
Joy Killa
10. If you were to attend a 2-day event at Flag regarding Ideal Orgs, what activities would you be most interested in participating in?
Tarring and feathering COB, AFTER sending him out to s*ck co* k on Hollywood Boulevard.
11. What do you feel would help you the most in promoting and getting people to attend a 2-day event at Flag regarding Ideal Orgs?
Throw a big rave with live music, assorted psychedelics, and unconditional CASH refunds to all attendees.
12. How much do you feel is a reasonable ticket price to attend a 2-day Ideal Org convention at Flag?
Optional donation of 47 cents.
13. Are there any particular subjects that you feel you need assistance with for your OT Committee or field?
I still wanna be knowing and willing cause over matter, energy, space, and time...subjective and objective.
I'm thinking that demonstrating that ability-humbly, of course!-might pull a few folks into my empty, broke org...
14. Anything else you’d like to communicate?
Hey, where are Shelley...and Tom Cruise...and John Travolta?
Thank you!
For all but a few questions, I'd answer: "Someone who's been under the radar but has decided to break free."
Favorite song? "Breaking Away" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZ67bpvH3_U&ab_channel=AlJarreau-Topic)
Favorite performer at an event: Hubbard when he announced his first clear (hilarious).
What would help in getting me to an event at Flag? Full cancellation of the disconnection policy.
What would be a reasonable ticket price for an event at Flag? Free.
Assistant for an OT committee: Levels that actually deliver what's promised, for $500 max.
Anything else? Nice of you to ask, but it'd take too long to explain it to you.
I wonder how many responses they actually get.
Well, they gotta pay for all those prime time TV commercials in Los Angeles somehow!
Will Gavin Potter and Micheal Chan be in the running for favorite speaker?? The old 'beat the bushes' faith healing, snake oil salespeople crew seems to be out to lunch. Maybe the old Hamhock himself, Grant Cardone can show up. Who doesn't like Hamhock in their rice and beans?
Let’s see. I type slow. S…h…e…l…l…
I’m keyed-in.
I noticed, after a careful reading, the survey never specifically asks, "What would it take to get you to actually come to an Ideal Org event?" Or, "Why, or for what reason, would you attend."
Instead, the survey author takes up the position that of course you want to attend if presented with the right features and enhancements.
Well, my answer, if asked, would be that the only Ideal Org topic I am interested in is "How can Scientologists legally remove David Miscavige and replace him with a sane individual?"
Name Newiga F. Seagull
Org Tokyo Org singer
Case level Marathon training
Level Sub 3:45
Ideal Org Donation Status Bruised banana peel
1 Noelle North dressed in those funny bug costumes
2 How fast do Class Vs run?
3 Shelly Miscavige and Heber Jentzsch
4 See above.
5 Anyone with fre fries.
6 FREE. FRIES!
7 Top 10 reasons why are the Orgs empty.
8 David Miscavige performing the whole Road to Freedom album with We Stand Tall as an encore.
9 My cousin Perttu. He tried to poop on COB.
10 Getting the heck outta dodge after stealing the food.
11 Free food (not rice and beans).
12 If you pay me eleventy million €.
13 Finding Shelly.
14 Free Shelly! Free Heber!
LOL, please send these survey answers to them. Expiring with laughter here!
I would not answer the survey after be being asked to state: "Ideal Org Donation Status:" I mean, that's a clear indication that if you write in "N/A," you are an out ethics Scientologist that needs to be handled.