It’s spooky season, and Scientology doesn’t want to miss out on the recruiting opportunity!
As we’ve pointed out many times before, no matter how grim things seem to be for Scientology — with the pandemic hitting when the church was already dwindling, and with the bad press just never stopping — no matter how bad it gets, Scientology just never gives up.
And one of the grand traditions of Scientology recruiting is to piggyback on the traditions and successes of others. So that’s why it makes perfect sense that Scientology’s Hollywood Celebrity Centre has announced a Star Wars-themed Halloween family festival for October 28 and 29!
Here, check out this killer flier, space cadet!
Which part are you most excited about? The Star Wars Millennium Falcon hyperspace jump experience? The starship escape room? The bounty hunter scavenger hunt?
Did they just forget to mention the part about the stress test, the personality test, and a copy of Dianetics for only $20?
Oh, the tricks and treats you’re liable to run into there!
If you do go, please give us a full report!
Bonus items from our tipsters
Mark your calendars for this event as well!
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Thank you for reading today’s story here at Substack. For the full picture of what’s happening today in the world of Scientology, please join the conversation at tonyortega.org, where we’ve been reporting daily on David Miscavige’s cabal since 2012. There you’ll find additional stories, and our popular regular daily features:
Source Code: Actual things founder L. Ron Hubbard said on this date in history
Avast, Ye Mateys: Snapshots from Scientology’s years at sea
Overheard in the Freezone: Indie Hubbardism, one thought at a time
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I’m always disgusted by Scientology’s use of popular trademarks and copyrighted material to attract new public or support fundraisers. Scientologists have no problem plagiarizing other people’s creative work because that comes from Hubbards playbook. However if anyone tries to use scientology outside the organization they are attacked mercilessly. Their hypocrisy is endless.
All I can say about Celebrity Centers latest Halloween publicity scam is: MAY THE FRAUD BE WITH YOU.
These totally sane, super theta experts on communication, administration, and planetary salvation display their unbridled genius by hijacking popular culture in their quest to recruit thee and me to join their profoundly spiritual crusade!
Come for the love-bombing, stupid games, and mediocre food...and stay for the mind-numbing indoctrination, bank and credit card fraud, gaslighting, pee meter wankery, the finest adventures in Orwellian "ethics" , and the always exciting, universe-saving criminality! Stand TALL and be a member of an elite team of enslaved, deluded wankers!
Happy Halloween, you reactive meat-sacks!🦇🤑