Ready for OT superpowers, pilgrim? Scientology is waiting for you to come aboard!
We haven’t heard much lately about Scientology’s floating cathedral, its cruise ship the Freewinds, which plies the Caribbean and delivers the church’s highest auditing level, Operating Thetan Level Eight (OT 8).
But now a reader has forwarded to us a new marketing pitch that is designed to get Scientologists out to the ship so they can gain superhuman OT abilities in an adventurous setting. Avast there, pilgrim!
Here’s the entire new flier. We look forward to your thoughts on it. Does this get you excited to haul your thetan down to the dock?
FREEWINDS OT SUMMER EXPERIENCES
Step off the crossroads of the world and step aboard the magical Freewinds — most theta and OT space in this universe.
Indulge in a vast array of fun, exhilarating and extroverting activities ashore, from visiting some of the best beaches in the world to Aruba island tours, swimming with dolphins in Curacao to visiting Cartagena known as a pearl of the Colombian Caribbean. You can stroll the plazas and narrow streets with colorful buildings and flower filled balconies, where designer merchandise are offered with pride by a friendly and charming people.
THE LRH TECH TO GO OT
Now is the time to rise to cause and get up the Bridge! Freewinds OT Conventions and the Competence and Leadership Course give you powerful OT tools for immediate application to do so faster than you ever dreamed possible.
During the Summer, in addition to the Competence & Leadership Course starting every Saturday, we are also delivering our powerful OT Conventions, including:
OT Abilities
Gain certainty on the OT Technology to operate as an OT in life right now, no matter where you are on the Bridge so you can get yourself and your family to OT and create expansion across your dynamics.
Affluence Attainment
Gain the knowledge and tools to fine-tune your abilities, sharpen your skills and soar into Affluence in all areas of life.
Cause Over Time & Prosperity
Get cause over time and prosperity learning the tech to disintegrate barriers. Achieve the KRC you need to control your finances and launch your productivity to the next level.
OT Havingness & Success
Chart your way forward with the whole track philosophy of the Organizing Board. It's the ultimate analysis of your life, unleashing your ability to do!
WHILE ON BOARD
This Summer in addition to our powerful Bridge accelerating services, we have a wealth of activities for you and the whole family and your friends to engage in while you're on board, including sunset dinners at sea, scuba diving lessons, games on the Sun Deck, navigation bridge tours and more.
Special entertainment during this summer with the Freewinds Band and Luis Adrian Cortes and so much more.
MAGNIFICENT CUISINE
A culinary experience like no other.
"I love the food on the Ship, best food I've ever had in my life. It's healthy and nutritious." — Y.L.
BOOK YOUR TRIP TO YOUR OT SHIP TODAY!
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Source Code: Actual things founder L. Ron Hubbard said on this date in history
Avast, Ye Mateys: Snapshots from Scientology’s years at sea
Overheard in the Freezone: Indie Hubbardism, one thought at a time
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Oh, healthy nutritious food on the Freewinds! Riiiiiiight. My first day on my first trip on that little boat was a disaster never to be forgotten (so appropriate to see it docked in the small boat dock, surrounded by little fishing scows and dive boats!).
Got aboard, working on setting up equipment, and someone comes around with a greasy sea food platter. I guess maybe conchs and mussels or something, not sure. Deeply deep fried and heavily salted. Sort of good, the way french-fries are good.
After a few of these, imagine my surprise when the boat pulled away from the dock! Rocking, rolling, dipping, swaying. Soon my greasy snack was on the deck again, along with everything else I tried to eat for the next four weeks whenever the ship was underway. Ron Miscavige used to say "Ralph is in the bathroom again" when he'd hear me in the head. Ralphing with all my strength.
For a time they were bringing leftovers to the Galley (where the crew eat). I finally got to taste "Death By Chocolate" and other amazing concoctions intended to impress the paying customers. Don't know how anyone could call that healthy, though perhaps in the twenty years since I was there they changed the menu up a bit.
"where designer merchandise are offered with pride by a friendly and charming people." That sounds like the locals are trying to horn in on the Fleecewinds action. The lack of OT7 'classes' just shows how few are getting up the ranks to #7.
Notice how so many of the 'conferences' are geared to getting money. I wonder if the ship ever hosted some of the Christian prosperity preachers? I can see a convocation of fake Baptists and non-denominational dudes exchanging methods of parting fools from their money on that ship.
Someone check the engine room for Gavin Potter. Some folks on the mainland are looking for him.