16 Comments

Oh, no, no, no. This is awful! Unbearable. The mental trauma Whitney must have suffered to choose to end her life in such a brutal way. I'm absolutely heartbroken for her. She was clearly loved by family and friends alike, so I cannot fathom their grief, or the trauma her brother will have suffered upon finding her.

This is one of those stories that should transcend a crummy little cult, but it's Scientology and the ramifications of its tenets and practises on its members cannot be discounted. Add to that the speed with which her church would have turned its back on her upon learning of her suicidal thoughts and her despair can only have been magnified.

I'm so very sorry, Whitney.

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Yet another horrific story. Who knows how much relief could have been obtained if Whitney Mills pursued real medical assistance. One thing I know from reading this, is that Ms Mills was probably being pushed to the sidelines as far as its church members relationships with Whitney.

The church of scientology is not a group one wants to belong to if what you need is tender loving care, succor and medical assistance. You will only get this from real friends and family, not ones where the church of scientology comes first.

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Whitney Mills was a victim of the insidious mind control of the Clampire. Yeah, a touch assist will help with cancer. Her depression meant that she could not go on the cans and by expressing suicidal ideation, she became an outcast in the $cienoverse. Why those around her did not get her the medical care for Lyme disease is beyond the pale. Antibiotics and other drugs do wonders for Lyme disease. Add in a 'suspicious' growth on an ovary and no wonder Whitney was depressed. Everyone around Ms. Mills failed her.

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So sad to read this. This article should be sent to every active Scientologist.

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If she had just gotten to a dr she would have found out it wasn’t cancer !! Omg!! This is so senseless!!!

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What a tragic, pointless waste of a life. The cult of scientology strikes again.

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Dec 28, 2022·edited Dec 28, 2022

One thing desperate Scientologists might mistakenly also request "help" from Scientology, is the "End of Life" Assist or rundown.

When we were on the PAC RPF, and Jill Burkhardt (RPFed from Case Supervisor at AOLA to the PAC RPF, twinned with Misha Parodi for a while during Jill's cancer treatment period), passed away, Jill's auditor was I think Katy (or was it Jessica) Feshbach, and Katy came and gave us all a long briefing of the End of Life assist that Jessica/Katy gave to Jill (Burkhart, Jil had been an AOLA Case Supervisor prior to Jil's RPFing).

Remember that Sunny?

LRH also, was given the "End of Life Assist" by Ray Mithoff, at the end of LRH's life.

This Scientology "End of Life" assist isn't assisted suicide though, it's more like an "assist" to let a dying person on their deathbed finally "let go" of all ties to the physical universe they might be "stuck" on, is how Jessica or Katy explained her giving this assist or rundown when Jessica (?, I can't remember if it was Jessica or Katy Feshbach who was married to the then Snr C/S WUS Rodriguez) who gave it to Jil. Whichever Feshbach it was, she came and briefed us RPFers on Jil's passing and all the efforts to deal with Jil's cancer.

I remember the crowd of us RPFers, some ended up in grief, since it was a pretty tear jerking moment hearing all the effort Jessica (?) Feshbach who worked in CLO WUS Qual or CMO PAC or RTC wasn't she (?), she was married to Snr C/S WUS at that time, and also Jil's twin priorly (I think it was Misha Parodi who was Jil's twin on the RPF, and then the final auditing had to be taken over by Jessica F/Rodriguez who did the End of Life steps with Jil).

This needs discussing and airing.

The "End of LIfe" assist or rundown, is a real thing.

It needs nailing down exactly this "End of Life" assist or rundown, the exact procedures.

Here's the article I mentioned the death of Jill Burkhardt, when Jessica detailed the "End of Life" assist to us RPFers, how it was done to Jill.

https://nypost.com/2005/06/19/scientology-princess-is-a-spooky-shadow-on-kooky-katie/

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It was Jessica (the auditor) and I don't believe Misha Parodi was her twin because she was on OT 7. Jill's twin was a guy.

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Dec 30, 2022·edited Dec 30, 2022

Right, was it Angello, the guy from Italy that was Jill's twin? Or Tom Supak? There were some pretty "high" stellar tech people on the PAC RPF when I was there, Supak was the Review Auditor from the Freewinds. There was one of the top auditors from Flag Service Org there, they were both topnotch "tech" people.

Most people in Scientology in Sea Org, almost don't even have the time to learn how accomplished their upper brethren in "tech" really were, how much they'd done, how "good" they were.

Misha's dad I'd known, MIke Parodi, he was on an adjacent "mission" (mission impossible type mission) on the "routing forms" back in 1983, that I was also on.

What I dislike is lack of getting into the weeds, to describe things, and unfortunately then the fuller context, what was going on way deeper into all of the scenes all the persons on RPF were facing, was going on in their heads, and then the major themes and problems of the whole setup, which made things such a constraining "prison" like mental and physical environment, you (a writer , explainer) has to get more and more into important weeds, to describe the fuller predicament, the bad choices, the impossible choices due to the layers of bad predicaments, which surround Sea Org members, in the RPF, who also have serious physical health issues, and cancer on top of all that.

------------------

Misha was Jill's "buddy" not twin, giving Jill assists, and being her buddy when Jill was really ill with her cancer, going to the hospital with her, berthing with her. Not auditing twin, correct. But daily attendant for those worse months.

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More info, from an old post I made about Jill and her actual twin, and then Misha who was Jill's buddy/companion and not a twin.

ARS POST #20

From: Chuckbeatty77 (chuckbeatty77@aol.com)

Subject: Re: two stories from the RPF Newsletter

Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology

Date: 2004-11-13 19:43:35 PST

boobootigger@webtv.net (Tigger) wrote in message

news:<9a771807.0411130647.5ac3686a@posting.google.com>...

> dst@cs.cmu.edu (Dave Touretzky) wrote in message news:<419464b8@news2.lightlink.com>...

> > The "RPF Insider" series, written by an anonymous informant and posted

> > to ARS by Tory Christman, is going to continue with a new name: the

> > "RPF Newsletter". A lengthy newsletter will be coming soon. In the

> > meantime, the author has two short but sad RPF stories to share with

> > the world.

> >

> > The stories of Matteo Galbiati and Irene Gutensberger are appended

> > below.

> >

> >

Wow! I personally am shocked that Matteo didn't graduate the RPF. When I was on the RPF, at the end. In Dec 02, I was asked who I wished to finish up my auditing, and without question in my opinion Matteo was the best auditor on the RPF. I wanted him to be my auditor for my final auditing. That was not allowed, but to me his skill as a Flag auditor was evident. He to me, was the only person on the PAC RPF what to me represented what I observed in my earlier years at Flag, which is a "Flag trained auditor". Matteo is definitely in my book of that quality of tech person. Matteo is a Flag trained auditor. He had/has excellent TRs, the best of anyone in my opinion in the PAC RPF when I was there.

The way I remember it though, Jill and Matteo both returned to the PAC RPF, and it was a couple months before she then died. I remember Misha Parodi being Jill's buddy, staying with Jill, and Misha, bless her, was Jill's companion till Jill passed. Matteo and Jill were returned, when Jill discovered that her cancer returned, I believe that is the sequence.

But Matteo, I am sorry, but he is an exceptional individual, and even though I do not agree with Scn as a religion, in my opinion it is a loss that he is not auditing as a Sea Org staff member. No matter what the higher ups concluded about his auditing ability, or his tech outnesses, the raw person to person personal contact of the best auditors I met in my RPF years, and that is 7 years of being on the RPF, my highest thoughts go to Ray Mitoff, Pablo Lobato, and Matteo Galbiati. And the only auditors I consider better TRs wise than these 3, who I have met, are Sue Koon and Heidi Stahli, these last two are my all time favorite Scn auditors, and I have to include Murray Chopping (an old Class 12 from Flag).

But Matteo was a Flag auditor in the best sense of what that means. It is tragic the Scn movement is incapable of recognizing the best in their own people, to me this is unfortunate. (What a warped viewpoint mine must seem to some, but it sorrows me, having seen so many great individuals move one way or the other out of the top ranks of the Sea Org.)

Jill herself, to those who know of her history, this is a sad tale also. Misha Parodi was Jill's buddy or companion the final months of Jill's life, and Misha was Jill's buddy or companion earlier too when Jill thought she had beaten the cancer she had. I grew to know Misha, while I was routing out of the Sea Org myself, and Misha was routing out too, and she got out before me. (I was sad in a way to see her leave the Sea Org, her being so young, and her dad, Michael Parodi being such a great guy, and Michael is in the IAS WUS Membership office there in PAC, and it is always sad to see Sea Org families split up, no matter why it happens.)

While we were chipping old paint off the steps and landings in the stairwell closest to L. Ron Hubbard Way in the Lebanon Hall berthing building at the complex in 2002, it was then that Misha told me about her months with Jill, and the funny stories Jill told about her life.

Jill (a Class IX NOTs auditor I believe) would also fall under the techincal definition of celebrity, her brother being a Hollywood screenwriter or scriptwriter, and her brother had something to do with the story line of the movie Private Benjamin, the Goldie Hawn film. And Misha said the story line, Goldie's character, was based indirectly on Jill's life, changing the US Army with the Sea Org, that was the connection. Jill being a Bev Hills child of privilege, rubbing elbows with all sorts of trendy jet setting types. And giving up her Bev Hills life of many opportunities to dedicate her life in the Sea Org, which was an admirable commitment, I cannot myself disparage. I have to applaud Jill for what she felt was right about what she was doing.

To hold Matteo responsible, and to lose his talent as an exceptional auditor, it is just more twists in the odd fates played out in the Scn movement. These people (Jill and Matteo) are very real, very good people, in my book.

> > Gutensberger, Irene -- from Germany. She came to the RPF around 1998

> > from the translation unit in FOLO. She did not do very well on the

> > program and progressed slowly. In 2003 she was accused of creating a

> > serious flap by allegedly causing a fire in the galley with about

> > $130,000 in damages. This was caused by a cleaning rag she supposedly

> > left in a corner that self ignited around 4am. The entire galley was

> > burned out , , , ,. The guilt must have

> > been overwhelming. If anyone knows where she is, please help her.

> >

I knew Irene over the years, in the 80's we worked together for a time on the routing forms project, and in 2002 I was on the RPF's RPF when Irene was in the regular RPF Laundry team, and she made the mistake of leaving the bunched up bunch of incompletely cleaned cleaning rags, that still had some strong cleaning solvents incompletely evaporated, and due to the bunch of incompletely cleaned rags being dumped into the basket and returned to the galley as "clean", when they are actually still saturated in solvent, even though they were dry (one of the deceptive details of this tragedy is that cleaning rags can be dry and still have solvent saturated in them)but the dry rags, being bunched together, covered over in a huge pile, the solvent saturated dry rags still combusted spontaneously. What a foul lesson to learn the hard way.

From talking and working with Irene over the weeks or months until she routed out from the RPF's RPF, she was NOT in the end, torturing herself for her mistake. At first yes, of course, she felt horrible. I certainly did NOT treat her other than as a respected friend and fellow Sea Org member, and others in the RPF's RPF did not ostracize her unduly for her error.

One nice thing about the RPF's RPF, when one is on the way out the door, at least when I was in the RPF's RPF, is that you can relax and act like a normal person and drop some of the Sea Org ingrained weirdities, at least that's how I felt. I NEVER agreed with the Sea Org fad of viciously targeting people like occurs, and it is one reason I am very glad to not be in the Sea Org right now.

Irene's son is already out in the wog world, making good money, in fact I recall Irene telling me he bought Irene this translucent blue super Mark VII emeter so she could get through her RPF program, and so I don't think anyone has to worry much for her. She's reunited with him at least.

I also heard when she first got out, she moved into a nice apartment, and was enjoying her freedom quite nicely. She will do fine!!

Hubert is a great guy, and it is sad that this family is split, and I don't know what to say about that. That is sad is all.

Chuck Beatty

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Another life lost to Scientology.

It sounds like she was incredibly devoted - is there any worth speculating that she started to question everything?

Either way, she was caught between two evils: accept that her pain as an OT8 was her fault, or that everything she’d known was a lie. Truly tragic.

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To be so anguished that you set yourself on fire?

Every single individual who turned away, and did not offer help will share the karma of this tragical self-murder. I am so bitterly sorry for her.

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founding

Of course; she would not have been encouraged to go to any non-chiropractic or decent OB/Gyn. She feared cancer, and since that means she could not receive auditing- well no reason to live!!! Unbelievably horrible...and a young life that could have been treated and saved- Damn this cruel cult!

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This is terrible! Another Scientologist committed suicide after "going up the Bridge!" Your article brought back my tenure as a senior executive in the Flag Service Organization late 1970s early 1980s when I almost did the same, standing on the roof of the Fort Harrison Hotel, wanting to throw myself over the side. That emotional torture has stayed with me throughout my life. Yes, time heals, and in the present, I understand how it came about. But the memory never goes away. We have the names of those who committed suicide. But has anyone collected the names of those who seriously considered doing so? It might be revelatory.

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Not her auditing twin, but more Jill's "buddy" and attender, during the months Jill was undergoing cancer treatment.

I know, Misha and I were later on the RPF's RPF "decks" scrubbing stairwells, and Misha explained those months with Jill when she was doing assists, and absolutely, Mishas couldn't do any auditing, only assists and being with Jill and more like a buddy. Not twin, correct, in the RPF twin definition. But "twin" in the buddy role. Both were together for those cancer months, Misha went with Jill to hospital etc, I think they berthed same room, type of thing.

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I am not sure why the Church would not reach out to Whitney. She was their public and was clearly enturbulated (not happy). What ever she was asking for was a big red flag. Normally the church would jump on that to help the person but also to ensure they did not get mentioned in any articles like this one. Also, as an aside, this person is/was in very bad case shape, especially for someone who was supposedly OT 8. Nervous, depressed, uncertain, these words should never be part of an ot 8's vocabulary. Somebody missed the boat here.

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