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VIDEO: Scientology's latest promo to audit away your own space cooties at home!

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We have for you today another of Scientology’s newer promo videos that encourage members to pay for expensive upper-level “technology.”

Previously, we showed you a promo for Scientology’s notorious “running program,” the Cause Resurgence Rundown. And then a slick video about getting auditor training that made use of good-looking models, not Scientologists.

This time we’re back to actual church members (we think), who are promoting Solo NOTs, which requires a little explanation for the uninitiated.

We’ll keep it short. Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard decided at some point that it was dangerous to run classic Dianetics on advanced Scientologists who are known as “OTs” (for “Operating Thetans”), so at some point he introduced a new approach that he called “New Era Dianetics for OTs” which was then abbreviated to “NOTs.”

Solo NOTs, then, is upper-level auditing that an OT Scientologist does on their own, and not with an auditor. This occurs on the level known as “OT 7,” which is infamous for being the most difficult, most expensive, and most invasive of all the OT levels. It can take years and years to finish OT 7. (We remember Leah Remini’s mother Vicki Marshall, on Scientology and the Aftermath, saying that it had taken her 20 years to complete.)

Solo auditing on OT 7 entails holding both “cans” of an E-meter in one hand while operating the machine with the other as you test yourself looking for something called “body thetans.”

You see, you are an immortal being called a thetan that has lived for trillions of years, lifetime after lifetime in an endless series of bodies. But since the notorious “Incident Two” that happened 75 million years ago, we thetans here on Earth are saddled with other disembodied, invisible spirits that are called body thetans. Beginning at OT 3, a Scientologist’s goal is to remove these unseen entities through auditing. And on OT 7, you are doing the job yourself at home.

Mike Rinder has written some very fun things about Solo NOTs at his blog in the past. Here’s one example…

Though it is a “solo” level, meaning you use an e-meter to audit the invisible thetans in, on, and around your body yourself, they require you to pay to do the auditing at home and also you must return to the “Mecca” every 6 months so you can pay them to sec check you on the meter to see if you have been good. It is one of the more lucrative (for Scientology) levels on the Bridge.

By referring to a “Mecca,” Mike is talking about the Flag Land Base in Clearwater, Florida, and a “sec check” is an interrogation using the meter.

Mike added that Scientologists associate mystical qualities to those who reach Solo NOTs.

They believe Solo NOTs auditors caused the fall of the Berlin Wall. That they divert hurricanes from Clearwater. And all manner of other things (tending to ignore that fact they don’t avert catastrophes like 9-11 or Covid). This has long been something whispered in the hallways and “things everyone has heard.” Rarely do you see any direct reference made to this.

So, Scientology wants you to believe that you can become a superhuman while using your E-meter to remove invisible body thetans, and to bring home that point in this video they postulate a woman actually doing this stuff with her E-meter in…

…NEW YORK CITY?

The city actually looks great in this slick short film, but the people they have giving testimonials are typically vague. Once again, Scientology doesn’t including anything about what the experience is actually like or what it’s supposed to accomplish.

“I remember thinking, this could go on forever,” says Tory Christman, who was never able to finish OT 7 when she was in Scientology. “You’re supposed to be getting wins and gains. For me I was supposed to be able to handle my epilepsy with it. But it never worked. It was awful. Awful!”

The folks in the video looked stoked, however.

At the end of the video, we see the promotional message, “Be one of the 10,000.”

Mike has an explanation of that, too…

The dream that one day there will be 10,000 people “on or through” Solo NOTs (though at this point I think they are making less per year than are dying off through old age or untreated cancer). This is based on a statement from Hubbard about 10,000 people controlling the planet….Scientologists are literalists. They have to be in order to be good members of the cult. So, they are sure that when 10,000 people have reached Solo NOTs, the planet will be “theirs.”

Well, an OT can dream, right?


Thank you for reading today’s story here at Substack. For the full picture of what’s happening today in the world of Scientology, please join the conversation at tonyortega.org, where we’ve been reporting daily on David Miscavige’s cabal since 2012. There you’ll find additional stories, and our popular regular daily features:

Source Code: Actual things founder L. Ron Hubbard said on this date in history

Avast, Ye Mateys: Snapshots from Scientology’s years at sea

Overheard in the Freezone: Indie Hubbardism, one thought at a time

Past is Prologue: From this week in history at alt.religion.scientology

Random Howdy: Your daily dose of the Captain

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Tony Ortega